Happy Navratri to those who actually celebrate this festival. To those who just care to partake in the festivities; happy garba, raas, and sanedo to you. It's a festive time, women dressed in elaborate Indian attire, men dressed in traditional kurta pyjamas. It's an eclectic scene; a beautiful array of colors harmoniously circling the idol of a Deity while engaged in rhythmic and various forms of dance. Each year this festival brings together the Indian community and it's an encouraging manifestation of two worlds merging.
This festival brings out so much that is wonderful about our culture and heritage. Beauty, elegance, history, tradition are all petals of the flower that is Navratri. It is a celebration of good prevailing over evil. Navratri year after year often falls within a few weeks of Halloween and it seems that this festival also brings out the vampires, ghouls, and goblins from within the Indian community. I'm referring to the thug life, wannabe 'gangsta' teenage guys with countenances suited for mug shots. Along with teeny Tupac and bopper Biggie, there are the girls who show up in ghetto fab jeans, or indecent Indian clothes (i.e. no blouse). To compound matters, these ragamuffin teenagers show up at garba and use the time as their own personal meat market. It's disappointing to witness the way some of these kids behave. It's a shame the cloud of their arrogance is thicker than veil of their ignorance.
Showing up at garba to scope out and pickup girls has a place in the history of these events from the beginning. Back in the day when Expo Hall in New Jersey threw the grandest garba party in the entire nation, more than a few guys were there with an agenda other than dancing to Falguni Pathak. Wherever there are pretty girls, dressed up and free to roam the range, there will be guys hot on their trail. No sense in fighting with Mother Nature and human nature. Years back there was a sense of respect that was prevalent. What's apparent now is this respect is less prevalent. The junior mafias that attend the garba events at local high school gymnasiums across the country are showcasing their new threads, their new shades, new whips, new anything. It's a symposium of adolescent egos gathering to demonstrate who is going to be the alpha male and female. Recently the following conversation between a girl and a guy at garba event in New York:
Girl: "Don't I look pretty tonight?"
Boy: confused look, unsure how to respond, so he just nods.
Girl: "Don't answer that. I looked prettier yesterday."
Now this is one exchange, and it's definitely not representative of the general population. But look around next time you are attending a garba event and see for yourself. Take notice and see if you can recognize the deterioration of our culture happening right before your very eyes. Look at how some of the teenagers dress and how they conduct themselves. Notice the sleazy, meat market feel to the whole place. There are kids at garba events that just look like they should be at a house party.
There is a tremendous amount of tradition and culture that is prominently displayed during this time of year by Hindus. There is the religious aspect of celebrating the victory of good over evil (Ram defeats Ravan). There is the cultural aspect where the Indian woman has the chance to dress in ornate, traditional, decent attire. There is the community component which brings so many people together linked by a common heritage. There is so much that is so great about this time of the year. Let's take the time to appreciate it and extend ourselves in some way to preserve this beauty for future generations.
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8 comments:
Hey.
I read ur blog.. well i guess it just pops up every-time in news feed.. and it also seemd very interesting.
But I definitely agree with you, Couple of garbas that I have been to this year, it just seemed like like were there to pick up girls. And for the most part it seemed like the girls were there to be hit on.
Navarati is a religious celebration, as well as a chance for all of us to come together, and celebrate our heritage and culture. However, when I see girls wearing these backless navaratri dresses, it just comes as such a disappointment to see our culture being flushed down.
All in all your blog is awesome...
There's no doubt that culture and religion are tainted in today's youth. But I noticed it's not just here in America. This is actually happening in India too. There are articles all over the internet about how the new fashion for girls' navratri outfits are supposed to make girls feel sexy and attract more attention. This whole back-less blouse trend actually started in India. Without any finger pointing, I think it's safe to say that today's youth as a whole is not so much interested in culture, religion, and tradition, as they are in all the wrong things about garba these days.
First of all buddy, I think you are forgetting a very important point here. Not only does it bring out the Masala Disney version of Fifty Cent and Mariah Cary that would describe young Indians today, but it also promotes THEIR culture as well. I've been going to garba since I've been able to walk. The one thing that gets under my skin more than anything is when these teenie-tarts make up their own "Garba Dance"! By Garba Dance I mean when they take 2 steps forward shake their asses (as if this will please god), and continue walking, in no rhythm what so ever.
Unfortunately, India and Indians are merely a victim of success. Like all victims of success our egos take over, and we tend to forget where we came from. On the other hand, a little cleavage never hurt no body.
Great blog!
I agree with all of the sentiments posted above. I used to a an avid participant in garba (even though I'm punjabi) because I know it's a celebration for Durga Ma, who I feel very strongly about.
Unfortunately, as the years pass, this event is becoming more of a meat market and hang out for the desi gangstas in NJ and NY.
Is there any event during which people can just put aside their pride, new clothes, whips, etc. and just come together to celebrate our culture and religion?
I no longer go to the India Day Parade because of the same reasons. It's a meat market and fighting ground for everyone who thinks they are "cool" and "hood".
I'd love to hear thoughts about this from people ages 18-25...maybe we are just getting old. Maybe we just have matured and realize how important our culture is and how corrupted it's becoming.
As a young twenty-something, I found your article hilarious, amusing and thought-provoking.
Hilarious because your play on words about the true reflection of Indian culture.
Amusing because NY garba is slightly different to our style.
Thought provoking because everything you wrote has and will inspire many readers to be more vigilant our Indian youth.
I personally thought some comments were bordering chauvnism; a viewpoint of a (female) feminist... maybe because the eyes lure you to the opposite sex rather your kind :-P .. jokes.
As a female myself, I don't enjoy the attention I receive at garba. I enjoy the bhajans, I enjoy dance and I enjoy socialising. Simple. Do I ask for the attention? Do I enjoy seeing men looking at me as sex-on-wheels? It's a norm regardless of your clothing, dance moves, or looks.
It's a hard fact; yes we're diminishing in the true value and sentiment of garba. It's even true in India as the highest case of abortions are taken place post-navaratri.
I think this great article is food-for-thought, let's use it to brainstorm ideas on how to be bring more awareness to the youth.
There's a beautiful quote:
Bad things happen because good people don't do anything.
Or even better - every ounce of action makes up for tons of theory.
I don't know how you guys bring awareness with youth in NYC.
But in Oz, I think it would be great if there was strict dress code, friendly but firm security and speeches about why we're getting together for this joyous occasion.
Mister Umerica -- hats off to you, very well put!!
I whole heartedly agree. I've been going to garba since i was a wee child learning to take my first steps in India, so the celebration has a special place in my heart, it's a part of my history, and a family tradition. Since I can remember being in NY which has been for the last 26 years, I remember going to Geeta Mandir for garba. I grew up going to Geeta Mandir for garba when this whole charade of meeting girls at the garba started.
I remember seeing the hordes of Newtown HS and Elmhurst boys, mostly non-Hindus, I might add, inside the mandir watching girls and the girls playing into it. I remember during the short 5 minute break between the garba, every girl would run outside, under the premise of "needing air" just to hang around in clusters near the boys who would watch and make noises and sing non-religious songs.
However, I must point out, that your blog places the bulk of the blame on the boys, where I feel that the girls are equally to blame if not more. Sure, where there are pretty girls, there will be boys hot on their trail. Just think about one thing, if you were one of those boys and were looking to “hook-up” with a girl at garba, and the venue you attended did not give you that opportunity, would you go back there again? If the pretty girls didn’t look your way, didn’t give you the time of day, I bet you my favorite collector's edition comic book, that the next night when you and your posse are figuring where to go for garba, that place will no longer be an option and if it still it, it will only be for another day or two if this ignoring behavior by the girls continues.
For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction…take away the action and there won’t be a reaction…yes?
Girls are quick to complain that boys make every place they go to, a “meat market.” I used to go to Diwali Mela at South Street Seaport in my young, “cool” days, and sure I enjoyed an occasional flicker of attention from a cute guy, but at that time, I also spent 1.5 hours getting ready just to walk around and look pretty and noticeable. I stopped going to that event for the last 7 years and I just went back this past weekend since then. I spent a total of 15 minutes getting ready and spent 2 hours getting my friend’s 3 year old son ready. We got there in time to spend an hour walking around so my friend’s son could look at the stalls and buy something to eat and get to the pier so we can find a nice spot so he could watch his first ever Diwali fireworks. Not a single guy approached me or my friend, no comments, looks or anything. It was a refreshing change and my friend and I discussed it on our drive home. We noticed girls parading around there with high-heeled shoes that were definitely not for walking the cobbled streets of South Street Seaport, in skimpy clothes that were not warm enough for October weather and for the added “desi” touch, we noticed dupattas draped seductively around their waists and shoulders, barely covering anything for which the dupattas are traditionally made for.
So my theory proves true, girls are as much to blame for these religious/cultural events turning into “meat markets.” And that description for a culture whose backbone is vegetarianism…how ironic?
P.S. -- One small correction on your information. The grandest garba party in the history of the nation was not Expo Hall, it was the one year where Flushing Meadows Corona Park hosted the first ever heated tent garba event for 9 straight days with all the fixins..And that's where the meat market officially started from. Even before that, Geeta Mandir was the original location to host garba after which various schools and hindu centers picked up the idea.
I really enjoyed reading simplydesi's comment. It was intelligently argued. And I agreed with most of her sentiments...
But I would like to share a story (from many) about how women are abused regardless of wanting attention, being married, attractive or their clothing..
An aged grandmother at a Hindu mandir in Ahemdabad shared wise words with me, that are be etched into my memory forever:
"Child, you may not believe me right now, today or tomorrow, but there will be one day in your life where you understand my true sentiment about what I'm saying.
Be careful when trusting men, even in India, days of "kalyug" are showing their true face... I've been made passes on the street by men that are young enough to be my son. I've heard of cases where women my age have been molested in broad daylight.
There always should be a sense of respect and sincerity with relationships, and turn on their daughters"
NOTE - I've also read articles in Times of India of grandmothers (who wear saris) being raped.
The religious grandmother spoke to me out of the blue. All I did was greet her by eye contact.
I understand what she means, as I've witnessed men that LOOK "respectful" undress women with their eyes...
Just because the man in the sherwani doesn't listen to tupac and doesn't wear gangsta clothing…doesn't mean that he’s not going to talk the talk and walk the walk to get women in bed. He’s just going to be more discreet about his intentions.
I’ve also heard from close sources about “mandir” men going to prostitutes..
CORRECTION - It should have read
"There always should be a sense of respect and sincerity with relationships, and in these dark days, fathers even turn on their daughters"
In paragraph 6
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