Mister Umerica

My favorite museum experience...

2011-01-19T12:02:00.000-05:00

The season was Fall and I was 10 years old and in the 3rd grade while attending public school in New York City. I was quite small in stature, but my imagination was vivid. I had yet gotten glasses, so I had the look of an angel. But how many 10 year olds live up to that label? The Museum of Natural History is located uptown on 5th Avenue along Central Park West in Manhattan, New York. It’s an exhibition of fantastically displayed dinosaur fossils, historical artifacts of ancient cultures, and information spanning the natural world and universe. At the time of my initial visit though, I knew it as the place where dinosaurs lived and Native American tribes continued to roam free. To this 10 year old, I was going to see history; I was going back in time.

I boarded the bus with a book-bag that was filled with some snacks, Hawaiian Punch juice, and a peanut butter & jelly sandwich in a paperbag. The bus ride was ripe with anticipation. Kids were munching on snacks and sharing with each other. Teachers and chaperones were hollering instructions to stay seated and to keep the noise down (talk about unenviable tasks). I was seated in the middle of the bus with my good friend and the buzz from all the kids’ chatter was electric. Everyone was so enthusiastic (sugar from the snacks probably helped). I had $10.00 tucked away in my wallet which my mom gave me to spend in the gift shop! My dad reminded me to get something for my mom. I got each of us a dinosaur pen! The excitement compounded with each pothole the cheese-bus rolled over with a gasps of oohs and ahhs. As we pulled up to the museum, there was a roar from all the kids. What isn’t thrilling about seeing larger than life creatures the size of apartment buildings we lived in? I was in awe that I was about to see a T-Rex in attack mode, with its teeth set to rip into its lunch. I was ready to see the Native Americans.

We entered the Theodore Roosevelt Rotunda and checked our bags and coats. As I turned around, I was greeted by a magnificently large creature with every bone visible. So this is how humongous a dinosaur was? It wasn’t the T-Rex, but rather the Brontosaurus. I instantly grew fond of this gentle giant because it was a vegetarian like me. From the start, the group was told to stay together, but my buddy and I had to be told more than once to not go too far ahead. We just wanted to see it all and couldn’t be bothered to wait. I had to be told more than once not to go over the ropes to touch the fossils. Looking back, I am shocked I didn’t bring down one of those beasts. The eagerness within me was alive and harnessing it was just not easy. I would go on to witness an amazing array of exhibitions portraying dinosaur after dinosaur as well as ancient Native American tribes as they lived long before the U.S. was colonized. All the while I was under the watchful eye of chaperones. Though I wasn’t going to cause any trouble (most likely), or break anything (somewhat lucky I didn’t), I just wanted to get as close to the history that was within my reach. I wanted to touch what lived on Earth more than 240 million years ago! I wanted to talk to the tribesman who hunted bison and lived in America before it was America. I was 10 years old and my imagination had a large appetite. I ate the history up and it has stayed with me since. The notion of something being historic threw my imagination into hyper-drive.

My love affair with history was cemented at that point and I’ve never been the same; for the better. My appreciation for natural and scientific history has continued to escalate into different realms. I value learning about different eras and important people who have influenced the world in subtle and profound ways. Through museums, as different artifacts have been put on exhibition over the years, I’ve been able to bridge the education to my still vivid imagination. I’ve continued to develop my knowledge of history by educating myself by reading books and studying it. The study of history opens a great many doors, it all depends on your imagination’s hunger.

It’s with great passion I look forward to the grand opening of the Swaminarayan Museum in March, 2011. Though I am no longer 10 years old, my imagination continues to hunger with great intensity. I am afforded an opportunity to be amidst the presence of artifacts from Swaminarayan Bhagwan’s life which is most humbling. I look forward to being on the plane with great anticipation as I will be traveling with a good friend. I will have a little more than $10.00 to spend at the gift shop. I’ll certainly remember to get something for my mom and my dad this time. I probably won’t have to be told more than once to keep a good distance from the artifacts. I’ll probably be well behaved; I’m so excited so no promises.

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Heighten awareness for the Grand Opening of the Swaminarayan Museum http://preservationplus.blogspot.com/

The Mirage of Religion

2009-10-27T00:27:00.004-04:00

Religion is considered different things by many people. There are those who are devoted believers apply faith and God to every facet of their existence. There are those who although acknowledge the divinity of the universe-creating entity, do not adhere to a strict code of conduct for His sake or in His honor. Some people dismiss God outright and appeal to the secular theories that explain creation of nature. Between each of these classifications there are tribal groups which have varying levels of belief and intensity attached to their personal agendas. Religion is not going to a place of worship, kneeling and paying homage to a martyr, saint, or idol. It's not donating money earned through unscrupulous endeavours in the hope some profit used in God's name will cleanse the guilt. It's not believing when something is at stake and preparing a list of reasons for why He that reigns supreme over all must oblige your requests.

Describing religion is not very easy since it's an unknown entity. There are a series of theories and hypotheses which are the root of every religious debate. There is no guarantee that the edicts of age old scriptures is the appropriate way to live. There is no way of knowing for sure what the outcome of living a pious live entails. No matter which faith we discuss, there are a lot more questions than there are answers.

It's far more productive to explain where religion can be found. Though I do not know what it is, I can tell you that I believe it's found in the oncology department at hospitals. I also think Religion can be found at shelters where homeless, hungry, and abuse victims gather to avoid having to brave another blistering winter night on the streets. Religion can be found in Kindergarten classrooms.

All of these instances and examples of where religion can be found revolve around the premise of humanity. It's through my eyes that I've seen religion within the scope of these locales. Oncology wings are a testament to the brave patients and resourceful medical communities. The patients have to undergo intense, debilitating medical treatment just to perhaps have a chance at beating the cancer. The medical communities have invested billions of dollars in research to develop better treatment and care for patients with cancer. The brilliant minds that have spent countless hours involved with this research has contributed to the advanced level of care we are able to provide these days. The lesson here is that there are times in a person's life when life is not the most important detail. Simply breathing becomes a religious experience. Simply being able to exist and be part of the scenery becomes a good day. The many people involved with the fight against cancer fosters an environment of togetherness and camaraderie. There is a unified vision and collective understanding that improving the quality of life for another human being is paramount.

Shelters across the city serve the needs of the homeless, hungry, and abused. These shelters are where some people go to work everyday. Some people rely on these shelters to keep their families warm, fed, safe or all three. Witnessing how those who live on the lower rungs of our very tall economic ladder is an incredibly humbling experience. There are criminals and unsavory characters amongst the masses which convene at these shelters. There are harmless and innocent bystanders to the economic struggles facing us today also in the group. There amidst a mix of many types of people is a system which is predicated on serving others. The notion that a fellow human being may have to sleep on the street, or be hungry, or need protection from someone else causes enough disturbance that this service is offered. There are people who live to serve others. Regardless of their scruples or lack thereof, they are humans and they need food. No one should be hungry. No one should have to sleep on frozen concrete. People care about one another and try to help others without any expectations. No thanks necessary, just providing a service that will improve other people's lives. Religion is found in the bitter, angry souls that frequent the shelters. It's in the grateful, appreciative hearts savoring every drop of soup as it heads down to their stomachs.

Dealing with kids can be described as a religious experience by some inexperienced parents. Teaching a motley-crew of rugrats their ABC's and 123's while incorporating "sharing-is-caring" and "say please & thank you" lessons is an entirely different category. The kids evolve from their initial fear of being away from home to getting acclimated to their new playpen. Missing Mom evolves into a playtime and fun in a myriad of ways. Teachers demonstrate extreme patience with these children who are no relation to them. They accept a great amount of responsibility and receive very little compensation. Their spirit and enthusiasm contributes greatly to the foundation of these children. There is religion in this unselfish, humanitarian function. Loving and teaching children is a way of making the world a better place.

Religion is something that can only be described when found. Once that moment of discovery passes, the definition of religion fades away. Religion can't be remembered as a memory. It can't be foretold like a fortune. Religion is in every step we take and every breath we breathe. It's found in the eyes of the careless, but remorseful. It's in the tears of a scared, lonely child. Religion is found in the elated shrieks of new parents. Religion is found, and then it's lost and then it's found again. It's the most beautiful mirage because it constantly remains elusive.

Positively Charged

2009-10-01T20:11:00.002-04:00

Opposites may attract, but that doesn't mean you want to attract a negative attitude to complement a refreshing outlook on life. A positive disposition is likely going to be the impetus for great accomplishments. I hesitate to believe a champion of any sort charted their pursuit along a pessimistic route. It's incumbent on individuals to see the beauty of their dreams before they set out to achieve them.
Obstacles will appear and how we handle those challenges will not determine our success, but it will gauge our strength. The strength needed to be successful. The many challenges we face in life are going to leave us disappointed at times. We may not be strong enough and we have to continue to move forward. Negativity will only serve to hinder your forward progress. It's key to be able to understand before the journey begins that there will be moments fear and trepidation will be shadows following every step. Accepting this will eliminate the surprise and therefore they can be welcome guests. Though they won't be asked to stay awhile. The hurdles we can leap over heighten our sense of worth, and the ones which cause us to stumble hurt our ego core. It's the hurdles that hurt us that we will benefit from. We will learn a lesson. We know to train harder. We know that we are not where we need to be to be at the level we expect from ourselves.
Lessons are good. Without the lessons in life, we would not have the satisfaction of redemption. Being perfect would just be too boring. The excitement in life is found in the wrinkles. Fun can definitely lead to many wrinkles! It's about the charge that we apply to the socket in our soul. Insert a negative cell and it's going to shock your mind how long it will take to repair the damage. Be consumed with positive thoughts and aspirations, the results will be shatter any image of happiness you may have ever dreamt. The sadness that accompanies disappointment will subside. The hope for a bright future will be restored. It's in the moment that we realize we are born to be happy. Our souls are chasing destiny which has no limits, so do not set any. Positivity is the means by which we survive and thrive. Thrust yourself into it. Allow positivity to manifest itself through your eyes and smile. Let your ears hear the optimism that resonates in the wind. The rain brings with it rainbows. The snow brings with it blankets of heat. It's in the perspective of our mind that our heart is led. Direct it towards a destination marked with an 'X' underneath which lays greatness.

Love is not Enough

2009-09-10T16:16:00.003-04:00

The recommended daily allowance of nutritional ingredients helps guide individuals concerned with their health towards a balanced diet. There is no recommended daily allowance for love in a relationship though. It's evident to me that love is not enough, therefore there are many other ingredients which are essential for a balanced relationship.

Among those ingredients is communication. I'm a guy and I would testify under oath that I do not want to know everything on my girl's mind. However, I do want to know enough so I can understand why she's being irrational and moody. Perhaps it's just her hormones, or her way of craving attention. Maybe she's frustrated at the simplest thing but has tortured the thought to death and it's not magnified to 100x beyond reason. Communication would amount to fiber in the diet. Fiber satisfies an appetite, but not the taste buds. It's key for parties in a relationship to understand one another. Making the effort to get to know the other person would in effect enlighten each person about important details. It's not a clinical, rest-on-a-sofa exchange of ideas that equals communication. It's in the simplest question being answered honestly. It's not what you say, but how you say it.

Another essential nutrient for a balanced relationship is spice. No one likes a boring lover. Integrating communication into the bedroom is vital for a passionate love affair to evolve. Relationships tend to transform from exciting adventures to the great beyond with unknown dangers into uneventful kayaking on a quiet, shallow stream. Spice it up but do not overdo it. Too much anything is not good for you. Sprinkle it on and savor the taste. Be one with the experience and do not let the fear of a little fire keep you from feeling the heat.

Love is not enough. You need to talk to your girl and love her. Be good to her and respect her. Be gentle because she's fragile. She's unwilling to show her weaknesses, but accept her as such. She'll be firm and strong in her opinions. But it's her heart that needs to be comforted all the time. There is no recommended daily allowance for this. It's an on-call, full-time, no-limit type of matter. Patience and compassion must shoulder some of the load so love's reach is greater.

Slumdog Millionaire

2008-12-03T01:38:00.002-05:00

A nice film. An intriguing plot. The poor and underprivileged of Mumbai's slums were not exploited. There was a realistic presentation. The circumstances the lead character, Jamal, faces and overcomes are admirable. This is not going to be a review of the film though. I am not a critic and this film should simply be viewed and discussed, not reviewed.

One scene in the movie is what has me up at 2am. A child's innocence can often lead him to do things in haste. Decisions made in haste can often backfire and cause more harm than good. As the devil or one of his henchmen once said, 'the best laid plans' - any how, what would compel a person to jump into a pile of human feces? Perhaps faced with a life of death scenario, it's not hard to imagine opting to hold your breath while covered in #2 rather than breathing no more. How about something less dramatic. Imagine a motivating factor that stems from the heart in the form of passion or love. Could you love something enough that in a matter of a few seconds, it is deemed worthwhile to be covered head-to-toe in shit?

Jamal is a huge a Amitabh fan and he keeps a picture of him in his pocket at all times. While negotiating a shy bowel movement in the slums, the locals begin hollering "Amitabh's helicopter, Amitabh's helicopter!!" One of Jamal's friends locks him in the outhouse he was using leaving Jamal with only one possible exit. He takes the picture of Amitabh out of his pocket to protect it from the awful fate that his body is about to be subjected to. His 4 1/2 feet frame goes about 4 1/4 feet down into a pile of what is clearly disgusting waste. The arm holding the picture stretched upward the entire time, was not damaged. Upon climbing out of the wastehole, he proceeds to run looking like 4 scoops of chocolate ice cream without a cone yelling "Amitabh, Amitabh!!" Clearly aided by the stench of his newly aquired body odor, he reaches Amitabh through a path cleared by his stormy Category 2 descent. He gets to Amitabh and he gets the superstar's autograph. Arms raised in ceremonious fashion, Jamal does Johnny Drama proud with a "Victory!!!" pose.

The sheer enthusiasm in his pursuit of an autograph was thought provoking. He chased what his heart wanted. He did it without regard to any common sense. When guided by common sense, common results are achieved. It takes the heart of a child, which is wrapped in a membrane of innocence and uncorrupted passion. The passion that leads an adult includes greed, lust, ego. Self-gratification is a common deterrant to achieving life's passions. But the innocence that a child brings to the table is clearly the remedy to making life worthwhile. So what if there is a pile of shit on the way to making the dream come true. Isn't it all about the goal anyway? Does it really matter if everyone thinks you smell like poop? In the end, when you have the autograph and you have the satisfaction of knowing you did everything you could to make your dream come true, are you going to be able to smell anything but the sweet smell of accomplishment and satisfaction?

Thanksgiving - Let's Say Thanks

2008-11-26T11:03:00.005-05:00

Let's say thanks. There are thousands of troops deployed overseas who are representing our country with pride and honor. They are stationed with the task of protecting our freedom. We are detached from the dangers that exist all over the world and faced by many other nations. We are protected by two oceans and friendly neighbors to the north and south. Despite the tragedy of 9/11, we are relative safe compared to many other regions in the world. Our nation's foreign policy adds fuel to the hatred of Americans and the western world held by some factions. But all in all, there is a level of security that we have and that we take for granted which should be acknowledged.

Imagine how badly a soldier would rather be walking down Main Street, U.S.A. with a couple of bucks in their pocket rather than patrolling a foreign border with an AK-47 over their shoulder. How difficult must it be to hear about the hometown football team through a news bulletin, after having attended an affair hosted by shrapnel and gunpowder. This is not about agreeing with the fight. But take a moment to put yourself in the boots and fatigues of a soldier. They are far removed from their lifestyle. They are away from their loved ones. Though they signed up for duty, their sacrifice should not be regarded any less significant. They are living a life of duty. They have learned to put their self interest behind the greater good. We walk along the avenues of the city and get lost amidst the splendor of the holiday season. The pretty decor, the window displays now prominently visible from afar. These soldiers are about action, whereas we who live in the land of the free are mired in distraction.

The spirit of Thanksgiving has long involved stories of the Pilgrims and Indians sharing a feast. Over the years, it's come to include other recognizable subjects such as, football, Black Friday, parades with big floats. The spirit of the holiday has taken on a form of thanks that is sad and embarrassing. We are not giving thanks to those who came before us and sacrificed their lives so we could live in freedom. We are giving thanks to the NFL for scheduling a couple of games. We're thanking retailers for discounts so we can spend more money than we should. We are thanking animators for coming up with creative cartoons so nice big floats could be blown up and then paraded down 5th Ave. The true spirit of Thanksgiving should be evident in the lives we live every day. Every day we have freedom, is a day we should be thankful there are people that have layed down their lives and fought for a greater good. Every day we have that affords us the opportunity to express our beliefs, is a day that we should remember there are troops as of this very second who are prepared to die before any harm comes to Americans.

Is all this too melodramatic for you? Is being thankful everyday too much of a chore? Then pick up and move out. Get out of this country and go live in a country that will not guarantee your right to a fair trial and to practice the faith you choose to. Sure our country is not perfect and not all people are treated fairly. But that is not because the system allows it. It's because of ignorance and the lack of courage. When you see something happening that should not be occurring, you should not walk away. You should think of the soldiers that are on active duty who won't walk away. This is not about picking a fight. It's about protecting those who are unable to protect themselves. Let's say thanks to those soldiers who are protecting us because we are unable to do so on our own. Pay it forward by being vigilant and helping to improve the nation we live in. Help make the country a better place so when our soldiers return, they are greeted by a kinder place.

The freedom we enjoy has come at a hefty price. Many lives have been lost fighting wars throughout the years. Now more than ever, after a decade of economic prosperity and technology kicking it up another notch, our lives are very rich in terms of tangible items. But the spirit of our lives has lost meaning. We must take the time to pay tribute to the men and women of our armed forces. The economy has since tanked and now we are looking at some turbulent times ahead. This is not the time to lose faith or spirit. This is the time to take measure of all that we have to be thankful for. Xerox is promoting a campaign that allows troops to receive a Thanksgiving Day card expressing our appreciation for their services. Go to http://www.letssaythanks.com/Home1024.html and support our troops. Take the time to express your appreciation.

Diwali - An Everyday Celebration

2008-10-28T15:19:00.005-04:00

Good defeats Evil and for eternity thereafter, the people shall have a reason to rejoice, celebrate, abstain from sinful activity and eat lots of food! Definitely not the textbook explanation, but it'll get me through the day. Celebratory fervor enhances all things. The excitement that new beginnings elicit is steadfast and firm amidst Diwali celebrations across the board. So many types of relationships are elevated to another level simply due to the intrinsic significance that is attached to the Festival of Lights!

Neighbors are awarded with freshly made sweets for their geographical prudence in selecting their home location. Strangers are greeted with subtle and warm smiles. A silent acknowledgment of their existence and their vital contribution to the human race. It may be done unconsciously, but it is evident nonetheless, kindness is manifested on account of the elation attached to the Diwali festival. Acquaintances are warmly addressed with much more love and affection. Friends are appreciated with a heartfelt sentiment usually spared for weddings or funerals. Family can't do any wrong. From the grandmother who asks questions incessantly to the annoying cousin who can't just take a hint. Estranged family are embraced and welcomed by a bridge crossing over the stubborn seas. It's the Brady Bunch, Partridge Family, Cosby clan, for the duration of the festivities at least.

Relationships that already are swimming laps in the clouds are elevated to another world during Diwali. The loved ones get the routine tender love and care with the added touch of appreciation and recognition. It makes all the difference when considering the start new year is akin to a bud yet to blossom. There is hope and promise for a brighter future and it's all attributed to the significance attached to Diwali. Couples are comprised of a pair, but function as a single unit. Stepping with the best foot forward allows the rest to just follow. Each spouse takes the time to appreciate the other during this time. So much work goes into preparing for this festival. Whether it's cooking food from sunrise to sunset for an entire week before the actual holiday or it's standing on line at a modest sweet store to get packages that will convey the sentiments filling the heart. Making the rounds to satisfy the familial and associated responsibilities becomes a battle for the couple to face together. Arm in arm, sweets in tow, making the rounds and ultimately coming home. Arriving at a rangoli decorated stoop, decorative lights illuminating the walls, sitting down together and knowing that the true meaning of Diwali is in that moment when they each realize they wouldn't have wanted to enjoy this festival with anyone else.

Generalizations will often result in alienating some people in some way. There is no way the thoughts expressed here are applicable to all people. But when considering the positive energy that is transmitted across a spectrum of personalities during this wonderful festival, it's a hope-filled perspective. It may not be how it is, but it sure wouldn't be so bad it were like it. There is a simple joy to Diwali and it's visible in the extra pep in people's step. Enjoy life's joys, big and small. It will make the difference between having a lasting memory or experiencing an everlasting moment. Ask yourself whether you'd want a photograph of an experience or a chance to relive the moment infinitely. Make everyday Diwali. Smile at the strangers. Be kind to your neighbors. Care about your friends. Love your family. Appreciate and value your spouse. Do all of these things everyday, as if everyday were Diwali.

NAVRATRI - Garba-time

2008-10-07T10:49:00.017-04:00

Happy Navratri to those who actually celebrate this festival. To those who just care to partake in the festivities; happy garba, raas, and sanedo to you. It's a festive time, women dressed in elaborate Indian attire, men dressed in traditional kurta pyjamas. It's an eclectic scene; a beautiful array of colors harmoniously circling the idol of a Deity while engaged in rhythmic and various forms of dance. Each year this festival brings together the Indian community and it's an encouraging manifestation of two worlds merging.

This festival brings out so much that is wonderful about our culture and heritage. Beauty, elegance, history, tradition are all petals of the flower that is Navratri. It is a celebration of good prevailing over evil. Navratri year after year often falls within a few weeks of Halloween and it seems that this festival also brings out the vampires, ghouls, and goblins from within the Indian community. I'm referring to the thug life, wannabe 'gangsta' teenage guys with countenances suited for mug shots. Along with teeny Tupac and bopper Biggie, there are the girls who show up in ghetto fab jeans, or indecent Indian clothes (i.e. no blouse). To compound matters, these ragamuffin teenagers show up at garba and use the time as their own personal meat market. It's disappointing to witness the way some of these kids behave. It's a shame the cloud of their arrogance is thicker than veil of their ignorance.

Showing up at garba to scope out and pickup girls has a place in the history of these events from the beginning. Back in the day when Expo Hall in New Jersey threw the grandest garba party in the entire nation, more than a few guys were there with an agenda other than dancing to Falguni Pathak. Wherever there are pretty girls, dressed up and free to roam the range, there will be guys hot on their trail. No sense in fighting with Mother Nature and human nature. Years back there was a sense of respect that was prevalent. What's apparent now is this respect is less prevalent. The junior mafias that attend the garba events at local high school gymnasiums across the country are showcasing their new threads, their new shades, new whips, new anything. It's a symposium of adolescent egos gathering to demonstrate who is going to be the alpha male and female. Recently the following conversation between a girl and a guy at garba event in New York:

Girl: "Don't I look pretty tonight?"
Boy: confused look, unsure how to respond, so he just nods.
Girl: "Don't answer that. I looked prettier yesterday."

Now this is one exchange, and it's definitely not representative of the general population. But look around next time you are attending a garba event and see for yourself. Take notice and see if you can recognize the deterioration of our culture happening right before your very eyes. Look at how some of the teenagers dress and how they conduct themselves. Notice the sleazy, meat market feel to the whole place. There are kids at garba events that just look like they should be at a house party.

There is a tremendous amount of tradition and culture that is prominently displayed during this time of year by Hindus. There is the religious aspect of celebrating the victory of good over evil (Ram defeats Ravan). There is the cultural aspect where the Indian woman has the chance to dress in ornate, traditional, decent attire. There is the community component which brings so many people together linked by a common heritage. There is so much that is so great about this time of the year. Let's take the time to appreciate it and extend ourselves in some way to preserve this beauty for future generations.

SINGLEDOM

2008-09-18T11:14:00.002-04:00

Having attended more than a few engagements and weddings already this year and a couple more still upcoming, I may be the guy version of that movie starring the actress from Grey's Anatomy. This is according to my esteemed fellow blogger - The-Indian-Guy (http://the-indian-guy.blogspot.com). So it sure seems that way though. It got me to thinking about whether I am content being single. Or am I ready to settle down. Or am I looking for a non-committed long-term relationship?

There's got to be some explanation as to why I am not the slightest be concerned about my single status presently. I decided to make a list of some reasons why I am content to be single; followed by a list that explains why I am ready to settle down.

Reasons to be content being single:
1) Freedom - to roam about the city at any time of day or night. To be at home or away from home and have no accountability to any one.

2) Peace of mind - from the drama that accompanies committed relationships. No hasseling or nagging or any kind of "-ing" that is not enjoyable.

3) Crickets - being able to hear those stringy creatures cricket in the morning. Being able to hear them at night. No voiceovers or "Honey, do this. Honey do that." God Bless those crickets.

4) Independence - be my own man. Be my own person. Retain my individuality. No need to compromise on everything, let alone anything. It's all about me.

5) Sharing - don't need to share food when eating out. Don't have to listen to "do you want to share? Why don't we just order 2 appetizers and 1 main course." No, I want to eat what I want to eat and I don't want to share.

Reasons to settle down:
1) Too much freedom - I'd rather have a loved one, a partner, a soulmate, a best-friend to be with while out in the city or while lounging on the couch at home. To be free is good, to be free and walking hand-in-hand with a loved one sure seems more appealing.

2) Too much peace of mind - If I want to live life like I'm in a coma, I guess the value of peace of mind can't be overstated. However, where's there's electricity, there's energy. What are a few shocks that accompany the nagging, the hasseling when it could just very well lead to the type of "-ing" that makes it all worth it. Hugging, Kissing, Embracing...yada yada yada... ;)

3) Bah-hum-Crickets - screw the crickets, I could not give a damn if I heard another ever again. I'd rather hear the voice of my beloved bellowing for me to take out the trash late at night or hollering at me to get out of bed on a Saturday afternoon. Houses are made with bricks, but homes are made with noise. All types of noises, but none more valuable and essential than that of the sweet lady of the house.

4) Over-rated independence - "it" being all about me is not all that it's cracked up to be. It's far more pleasing when it's about someone else. My heart filled with passion and passion is a currency that can't be spent on one's self. So there's unfulfilling byproduct of independence and it's a heart that bleeds out passion. No thanks. I want the passion in my heart to be explosive. I want to wake up beside my dear love and exude passion. It would be far more satisfying to live a life that is not all about me, but rather more about "her."

5) Sharing is caring - and it surely is. What's it like to go to a nice restaurant and sit across from the woman you love? When the waiting comes, you get to smile at her and while the waiter scribes the order, you hold your woman's hand and just know that sharing that dish is going to be more satisfying than the meal itself. So what if I'm not full afterwards, I can always suggest going to Mamoun's for some falafel and if you go back to (1) on this list; we'd have the freedom to roam the city as we like.

PUNCTUATE THIS!!!!

2008-09-18T11:14:00.000-04:00

Enough with the endless punctuation marks included in text messages. There has to be the understanding that after awhile, the incessant use of the "!" or "?" are going to render their effect useless. How can someone possibly understand the urgency of the message when every other thought is concluded with an "!", "?" or "!!!!??!!"? (That last question mark is legit). It's difficult enough to convey inflection and emotion in a text message, but the irresponsible use of punctuation by numb-thumbers is causing mass chaos amongst those of us who care to comprehend the meaning of the messges we're receiving.

Receiving text messages from a girl that might be someone of interest and trying to decipher the meaning of the text message can be an excruciating exercise. Now why resort to such ultra-resourceful methods you might wonder? Well it's simple, there's no sense in asking questions when the answers are very possibly right before us. The simple use of a an exclamation point following a "yes" can be the difference between "sure it would be nice to see you" or "I definitely am interested in seeing you and I'm excited about it." If people don't start using punctuation more responsibly, there are going to be a lot of us who are sorely disappointed by messages that read one way, but mean something else.

Waiting

2008-09-15T12:31:00.001-04:00

Life is about waiting. Lines are everywhere you go. If there isn't a line, you should probably stop to ask where is everyone before taking another step. People are willing to wait for what's valuable to them. Being a resident NY'er, long lines are commonplace all over the city. Outside clubs, restaurants, soup joints. There are lines outside restrooms, at the gas pumps (despite insane gas prices). Lines at the bus stops, taxi stands. At the airport, at the bus depot. No matter what, there's a wait.
Love is about waiting too I suppose. Waiting on a line that has an indefinite number of people. Waiting for the chemistry to cause a spark; then waiting for the spark to burst into a flame. It's not so easy to wait for love though. There's no place to wait. There's no actual line to be on. Going about your business in a routine way, but also waiting for love to come your way can be a trying experience.
They say love will find you when you least expect it. Well, being on line for love, eliminates the "least expect it" element. Love is not something you just decide not to concern yourself with. It's something you can submiss, but not dismiss or contain. The desire to find love and be in love is a constant. It's with each pulse of our heart. We have so many different things that we wait on line for but love is something that they say will just come to us. I don't believe it.

Give Life a High Five.

2008-06-28T00:11:00.000-04:00

A simple but illuminating message came through my inbox recently. Five rules to live by.

Have no hatred in your heart
Have no worry on your mind
Live simple
Give more
Expect less

When was the last time you said something negative about someone? Not in good humor, but with contempt and disdain. How about the last time you worried about something you had no control over in the first place? Probably something of this nature crossed your mind in the last 48 hours. In the great U.S.A., is there a such thing as living simple? Just ask yourself if you have more than you need and you'll have your answer. How about giving more and expecting less. What kind of nonsense is that? Why would anyone want to give anything if there is no reward for the effort? That would just be a profound waste of time. That's the problem with us. So many things we do directly interferes with our journey towards happiness. So much of our happiness is rooted and derived from the happiness we bring to others. Why do we let ourselves be shortsighted and insensitive when we ultimately are only hindering our own happiness.

Even been in a room while friends are laughing at racist jokes? Ever been the one to initiate the racist joke? It's so easy to laugh at people we find obvious ways to separate ourselves from. We can distance ourselves from one another so easily by looking at the color of our skin, the God we worship, the tax bracket we bitch about. Racial indifferences, societal imbalances, economic inequalities are great bases from which to generate good old fashion, mean-spirited humor. We like to laugh at others when it hurts them. Deep down it empowers us. It makes us better than the "others". But the sad, true reality is there are no "others." We are the others. When we make a racist joke and laugh at the ignorance of others, we're insulting ourselves. We're taking a piece of our heart and trading it in for a laugh. What kind of return on investment is that? Why say something about someone that you wouldn't want said about your mother or father (even if it were true?) Hatred has one place in our lives. The past. Have no hatred in your heart.

Worrying sure can take up a lot of time if you allow it to. It can consume your day from start to finish. Or sometimes it can just be an instant in a day, but it's enough to linger in your mind preventing other positive experiences to resonate freely. Why do we pray and yet assume the responsibility of worrying. Shouldn't that be left to a providential figure? Isn't that what we're doing when we pray? We're acknowledging a higher power and It's supremacy over all final results. So how great would it be to enjoy life in spite of the obstacles and challenges. No matter what; waking up in the morning and pre-deciding that it's going to be a great day. No hesitation, no doubt about it, that would be the life of a person with a mind free of worry. Guaranteed there is no one that wouldn't trade a life of worry for a life without it. So be rid of it and leave it to God. Let there be a reason for His presence and let it be to guide us, take care of us, protect us, save us. Don't worry. Just don't.

Living simple. Too much is usually what is around us. We have a car that too sporty, or maybe a wardrobe with one too many white shirts. Or how about that last pair of shoes, the ones that you don't have an outfit for yet, but just had to get anyway. Being simple doesn't mean don't run and get that 7 series or sitting in coach even though you're making six-figures. It's about not taking it over the edge. It's about not making it the crux of your life. Money mustn't be the source of the joy, but rather a consequence of being joyful. Be simple in the way you love your family and friends. Appreciate them for who they are and what they can do. No one is equal and no one can compare to ideals we establish within our minds. Live simple so that you don't feel like you're missing out on life. Be simple about achieving your goals. Put your best effort into a cause and let the results be what they may. Living simple is just one way of saying be true to yourself. Be honest.

Give more and expect less. Love is what makes the world go around. It's also what's been known to bring the house down. Love can be so complicated because we do not allow ourselves to understand our feelings. We think sometimes we know what is best for us and we convince ourselves we're fighting in the name of love. Love so quickly can evolve from being a selfless endeavor into a system of exchanges. "I love you" followed by "I love you too." That one always gets me. The expectation that arises after expressing sincere feelings can surely be a lot to handle. So why just let go of the expectations? It's far easier and much more rewarding to see the joy we can bring to others. Do you know how important you are to someone else? Do you know the role you play the lives of others? Have you brought joy to others? The smiles we crack can never compare to the smiles we elicit. Sharing is caring. No natural resource is more readily available than love. It sustains the destitute. It has long been the fuel for vagabonds and others lost in the world. Love and it's glorious magic can take a whirlpool and transform it into a jacuzzi. The question is, are you willing to build it for someone else while you toast in the sun? I hope so, because there is no greater love than the love we give unconditionally. Just give because it's what makes us great. It's the power in our hearts that makes life so great. It's all about love. Life is all about bringing joy to others. It's about sharing all the love in our heart with others.

I sure sound like a preacher right now. But I don't care. I'm saying what needs to be said. We have to improve ourselves so we can live quality lives. It's only after we improve ourselves, that the world around us will improve. Rid your heart of hatred. Don't laugh at mean remarks. Don't make mean comments. Don't fret about things you can't control. Rather, put your energy into dealing with things you can control. Use your mind and heart wisely. Don't waste them. Live simple and be happy with less. You'll appreciate it more. Give more, in every way everyday. Expect less so that your heart can fulfill its destiny by bringing joy to others.

Turning 30: Another corner, another bum

2008-06-14T09:21:00.000-04:00

Ten years ago, I was a couple of weeks shy of turning 20. I was looking forward to kissing the teenage years goodbye, but not the teenage girls. The advent of a new era inspired me. The dreams and goals that had long seemed so far away, were now not so distant. Brimming with confidence, head up high approaching another corner; never even noticed the bum.

Time definitely was not even a slight consideration. Turning 20, a whole new world was yet to be discovered. A new decade that was destined to be filled with momentous events and celebrations. So much to look forward to - 21st, 25th bday hoorahs! Graduating college. Perhaps attending and completing grad school. Marriage. Kids. Rewind - how about traveling the world to exotic locations. Making new friends and new memories. Meeting new people all ready to conquer the world and forging alliances that would last a lifetime. So much good yet to transpire. All rest areas to look forward to along the journey.

Fast forward to now and turning 30 sure doesn't feel anything like that. It's as if it's another corner, another bum. The magic that accompanied the innocence a decade ago, is now a jaded burn that results from too much exposure to disappointment. Older and wiser sure seems to be a popular consolation reference. Of course the rugrats doing the consoling are in their mid-20's. They still have wind in their sails, afloat in temperate waters. The chagrin on the face of those who already turned the corner and passed the bum, is validation that what's about to happen is not so positive. Sure there's plenty of future ahead. Of course looking 10 blocks down and seeing 40 can bring a fella down pretty quick. Head down and spiritless they missed the bum entirely.

Having been walking for 10 blocks, there's been ample time for reflection. About to turn this corner and about to pass another bum. But it's not about me any more. It's about something bigger. There is a bigger world out there and there is a lot of change that needs to be implemented. The world is need of selfless leaders. It's the courage of those who battle through experiences and learn from them that make this world a better place. Inspired by those many who have walked this road before, it's imperative to stop and notice the bum on the corner. Turning 30, I'm turning a corner. Walking away from an era when it was all about me. It's about others now. It's about making a difference. Having had my head in the clouds, and my head in my ass; I'll opt to keep my head straight as I approach this turn. Surely I'll notice the bum and I'll buy him a coffee. Because it's not about me any more. It's time I stop and hold my breath as I notice the bum.